title: Star Trek song - Number One author: unknown
	(To the tune of Piano Man by Billy Joel) * here is a midi file of Piano Man (7K) that you can download It's Nine O'Clock on the Enterprise The Ten-Forward crowd shuffles in. There's a bald man sitting next to me, Tugging hard on his tunic and pin. He says "Number One, can you play me a memory," "I'm not really sure how it goes." "But it's sad and it's sweet and I knew it complete," "'Fore the Borg put things up my nose." Play us a song, you're the Number One, Play us a song, very sharp. We're all on the ship for eternity, And you got us reeling at warp. Now Worf at the bar is a friend of mine, He gives me chills with his grin. He's quick with a choke and throws a few pokes, But in fights, he'll never win. He says, "Will, I believe this is killing me." As he smiles, showing teeth of his race. "Well, I'm sure I could be a movie star," "If I had another man's face." Play us a song, you're the Number One. Play us a song so sweet, We're all in the mood for some shore leave, And you've got us loving Starfleet. Now Bev is a medical practitioner, Who no longer is someone's wife. And she's talkin' with Geordi, who's sittin' with Barclay, And probably will be for life. And Guinan is practicing counseling, As Deanna becomes annoyed. Yes, they're sharing a job they call counseling, But it's better than being unemployed. (Instrumental) Play us a song, you're the Number One, Play us a song, so clean. We're all in the mood for a melody, And you've got us feeling serene. It's a pretty good crowd for a Stardate, But Deanna motions towards the door. 'Cause she knows it's me she's been wanting to see, Where no man has gone before. And my trombone sounds like a carnival, And the microphone smells like a beer, And they sit at the bar and gaze out at the stars, And say, "Man, there's no life out here." Oh la la la dee dah...